Steps of Faith and Obedience

             The Lord has been pushing me outside of my comfort zone in so many ways! Starting this blog a couple of years ago was one way.  Now, it is public speaking.  I did a brief opening talk yesterday for our women's CBS (Community Bible Study).  I was so nervous, but the Lord gave me courage and strength.  Sharing in front of all these women was a blessing for me and it is opening doors that I never could have imagined.  I have been invited by one of the women to speak at an event at her church.  I am also meeting women at my daughters' swim practices and gymnastics who recognize me from CBS.  Hearing from these women and others about how my testimony has blessed them has been so encouraging and edifying. My heart has been so full the past two days!  It is such a privilege and an honor to be used by the Lord!  I can not boast because it is all him.  It is just so amazing that he can use our personal brokenness for his glory if we step out in obedience and trust him.

              I was reminded today that the Lord has given me a story to share.  I just have to trust that it will be used for his good and for his glory.  During the opening talk, I deviated a bit from the script and shared what I felt the Holy Spirit was prompting me to share. This it the link for the audio recording: http://www.cbsclass.org/Portals/0/CBS/LessonLectures/11760/Opening%2010-23-13_2013_10_23_09_15_53.mp3 . However, below is the actual "script" that I wrote for the talk:  

             The bible tells us, "If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has passed away, behold the new has come (2 Corinthians 5:17)"  I stand before you today a new creature in Christ.  I used to be an athiest, depressed, and suicidal.   I finally gave my life to Christ 10 years ago, after a long bout with a mysterious illness that caused daily pain without much hope of a cure.  In my utter brokenness I cried out to Jesus to save me and accepted him into my heart.  Eventually, the Lord miraculously healed me and transformed me from the inside out. 

            The process of transformation in me is still ongoing.    Philippians 1:6 says,  "He who began a good work in me will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."  Each day the spirit works within me to mold me into the person the Lord wants me to be -- into a version of myself  He can fully use.   I am learning that obedience plays a key role in this process.  It is not coincidence that God wanted me to talk about obedience on the very day we study about Abraham.  Abraham's faith and obedience deepened his relationship with God, but it also had profound implications for God's kingdom.  Where would we be today if Abraham had not obeyed?  From Abraham's lineage came our very Lord, Jesus!  Obedience has a ripple effect that can impact others for God's glory.   Have you ever thought about that?  Have you thought about how God can use your obedience?

            I have been thinking about this a lot lately.   The past few months have been very difficult for my family, especially my brother, Brian,  and my sister-in-law, Natalie.   As many of you already know, my 3 year old nephew Nathan was diagnosed with a large brain tumor at the beginning of September.  He had surgery to remove the tumor.  During the surgery he had a stroke which left him paralyzed on his left side.  Doctors are still unsure about what to do with the remaining 20% of the tumor. . .  But the Lord is so good and  Nathan has regained mobility and is now able to walk and will be returning home this weekend!  

            I think from the beginning God knew the role he wanted me to play in Brian and Natalie's life and in Nathan's story.  But to be able to perform my role to the fullest,  I first needed to learn obedience one step at a time. . .  Whether it was to be baptized, share my testimony, leave a career in clinical psychology to be a stay at home mom, lead bible study with young moms, start a couples bible study with neighbors and my brother and sister-in-law, or become a children's teacher, and speak in front of all you -- each time I put aside fear and stepped out in obedience on what the Lord called me to do,  God has been faithful  and my relationship with him has grown deeper.  Even though it is hard for me to obey the Lord sometimes,  I find that what God has planned for me, although sometimes difficult, is also more rewarding than anything I could have ever imagined or planned for myself.  

            Our steps of obedience are never isolated incidents.  God always has a larger purpose for them that we cannot see in the moment, but if we remain faithful, he reveals it to us.  He says in John 14:15, 21, "If you love me, you will obey what I command. . . whoever has my commands and obeys them, he is the one who loves me.  He who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I too will love him and reveal myself to him."  I believe that the Lord has been revealing himself to me and bringing to light the purpose for a lot of the things he called me to do up until now. . .purposes I never quite understood.  There are too many examples to get into in this short amount of time, but suffice it to say that as I look back over the years I have been a follower of Christ, it is amazing how the Lord has used my obedience not only to mature my faith, but also to strategically place the right people around Brian, Natalie, Nathan, and our family, to support us during this time.

            For example, when the Lord called me to start a moms small group, I had no idea that one of the women in that group would ultimately serve a vital role in getting Natalie connected to a bible study that would be so instrumental in her faith walk!  The women in that group poured into Natalie!  And their husbands poured into Brian.  They watered the seeds that we had been planting for years, and helped those seeds bear fruit in Brian and Natalie's lives.   As a result, today Brian and Natalie are spiritually strong to endure this crisis, and glorifying the Lord all the while.   Three years ago I would not have been able to tell you, without a doubt, that they were saved. . . and had the tumor been found then, they would have been ill equipped to deal with it, let alone glorify God.  They knew about God, Jesus, and attended church, but I don't believe that they truly accepted him as Lord and Savior -- not until the past couple of years.  And then God pushed them in their faith hard and fast to equip them for this hardship.   I have never witnessed faith that blossomed and grew so strong so quickly. 

            Sometimes I pray to the Lord and ask him to take the remaining tumor away and heal Nathan completely -- because I have personally witnessed God's miraculous healing grace in my own life and I know it can happen.  But the Lord tells me to trust in him, and wait patiently.  That this is bigger than us. . .  I cannot deny the good that is coming from all of this situation for God's glory.  It is the promise of Romans 8:28,  "In all things God will work for the good of those who love him, and who are called according to his purpose."  The Lord placed it on my heart to start a FB page for Nathan -- to be a central means of communication and updates, but also as a tool for evangelism.   Close to 800 people are currently members of that page, and they are sharing it with friends and family who are not on FB.   It is amazing to see the body of Christ rise up to encourage and support their own -- so humbling!  People all over the world, in countries and states we have never been to, are praying,  and God has been hearing these prayers!  Over 900 of these bracelets have been bought and are being worn that say, Praying for Nathan.  

And these bracelets are sparking up conversations about the Lord EVERYWHERE!  My daughter wore one to school and she said 15 of her young friends asked her about it and she told them Nathan's story and told a few of them about Jesus.  It gives me such chills to think about how the Lord is using this situation for his glory!  I am in awe of him!   

            So what is my point?  It is this:  No matter where you are in your faith walk, even though it can be scary to step out into the unknown, each time you step out in obedience, it pleases God.  Obedience is faith and trust in action.  Each step you take will bring you closer to God.    You will be more attuned to Him working in your life.  Practicing obedience is like training your spiritual muscles.  Each time you obey, it makes it easier for you to obey next time.  Luke 16:10 says, "He who is faithful with little things, he will be faithful in large things."  You never know how God will use your obedience to bless others or to further his kingdom.   How God uses your obedience for his glory will be so awesome that you cannot even boast, because you will know that all the good is from the Lord and not from your own works.    God's got a big plan, and he has designated a special role for each of us to play.   He does not need us to accomplish his purposes, but he chooses to include us.  What an honor and privilege that is!  But God can't use us unless we obey.  God knows we won't always get this obedience thing right  -- If you are like me, you'll probably get it wrong more times than you want to admit.  But that is ok!  It takes practice.  But God is so full of grace that when we get it wrong he will comfort us and love us still.  And he is so patient with us and gives us many chances.   What is the Lord perhaps calling you to do today or this week?  Whatever it is he is, he will give you the strength and courage to do it.  His grace is sufficient.  Just step out in faith and watch his glory unfold.