In the Waiting Room

It is 3:00 AM.  Why am I up and writing? Insomnia aside, I'm up and writing at this hour because prior to going to bed I felt the Lord urging me to write since I have not done so in a while.  I felt him prompting me to write about my experiences these past few weeks in the "waiting room."  The waiting room I am referring to is the place where we as humans often sit and are asked to wait on the Lord.  Much like the doctor's office, it can be a restless place.  When will it be my turn?  When will my name be called?  It could be mere minutes or on certain frustrating occasions it can stretch to a half hour, an hour or even longer.

I have been in this waiting room for several weeks now. . .  I began dilating and having contractions around 31 weeks.  The contractions were occurring frequently and regularly and episodes would last for up to several hours each night.  There was some concern that I might go into preterm labor so my OB doctor ordered bedrest at 32 weeks.  Those of you who have multiple children know how hard this is to do.   Children still have daily needs that have to be met and you have to meet them even while technically on "bedrest."  Thankfully we received a lot of help from kind neighbors, friends, and family.  They helped to drive my children to school and various activities, bring meals so I did not have to get up much to cook, and provided the girls with entertainment in the form of playdates.  My mother-in-law even came for a few days to help with chores around the house and taking care of the girls.   We felt very blessed by all the love and help.

Three weeks of bedrest was tough but I obeyed orders to the best of my ability because I did not want the baby to come prematurely and have to be in the NICU or have other complications related to premature birth.  We prayed for the baby to stay put for a few more weeks til it was safer for it to come out.  We prayed for patience for me while on bedrest and being unable to do the things I normally do.  We prayed for peace about accepting God's timing.   And all the while we waited. . .   There were several "false alarms" due to contractions and we would think, "Ok, this is it!  It's time!"  We experienced anxiety, excitement, and anticipation. . . When will the baby come?  Any minute!  But then another day would pass, then a week, two weeks, and still nothing. . .

Now I am safely at 36 weeks and officially off bedrest.  Praise God!  But I am still in that waiting room.  It would seem that I served my time on bedrest well because it slowed down the labor progress.  As of Monday there had been some change with effacement and dilation, indicating that my body is indeed prepping for labor, but not as much as we had feared.  So it's still up in the air when this baby will arrive.  The doctor said it could be days, another week, or maybe even two.  Hard to say because every woman and pregnancy is different.  Today I was experiencing a lot of contractions and there was a point again when I thought, "This could be it!  I might have a leap day baby (born on Feb. 29th would mean a birthday only every 4 years!)."  But eventually the contractions subsided.  Then I woke up tonight with several more contractions that have since also subsided. . . I'm glad the baby and I have made it this long together, but I have to admit I am ready for pregnancy to be over!  I want to meet the face of my sweet babe and hold him or her!  I am praying very hard to maintain peace during this time and to stay patient.  I also pray that I am learning the lessons that God intends for me to learn during this trial.

What I have learned is that waiting is more than a fact of life --  it is a spiritual discipline.  Some scriptures that speak on this topic:

Wait for the Lord;  Be strong, and take heart and wait for the Lord.  (Psalm 27:14)
  
Rest in the Lord and wait patiently for him. . . Do not fret -- it leads only to evildoing. . . those who wait patiently for the Lord will inherit the land. (Psalm 37:7-9)


Be still and know I am God!  (Psalm 46:10)


The Lord is good to those who wait for Him,  to the person who seeks him. (Lamentations 3:25)


Those who wait on the Lord will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, the will walk not not be faint. (Isaiah 40-31)

Waiting is hard, but it is a test of patience.  Waiting is an act of the will and an act of obedience to God and at the end of the journey we are richly blessed.   As we wait, we learn that our self-efforts are futile.  We continue to take care of the tasks and responsibilities that God has given to us and we do not sit idle.  However, we learn that the larger things are out of our hands and control.  We learn that God is in control of it all and he has a plan for us that is better than what we have for ourselves.  As we wait we gain confidence and trust in the Lord to provide for us all that we need.  We experience more appropriate anticipation and expectation as we realize that whatever will come will be His gift to us according to his perfect timing.  "He has made everything beautiful in its time.  He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end (Ecclesiastes 4:6)."  Time for God is different than time for us.  He sees everything, past, present and future.  And things that are to occur in our life have been written in his book long before they even came to be.  As humans we cannot even fathom all of his ways.  We might get glimpses of his will here and there and because of that we can trust that he has our good in mind.   This baby will come soon and in due time.  What a miracle and blessing that will be!  So why do I need to fret?  Why do I need to be anxious?  I need to rest assured that he/ she will arrive beautifully in its time ordained by God himself.  Yes, I am still in the waiting room, but my name will be called very, very soon indeed!  Meanwhile, all I need do is wait and take care of the things that I can take care of (e.g., pack my bags).

Perhaps you are in the waiting room also.  Are you waiting for a new job?  Are you waiting to be pregnant and have a baby of your own?  Are you waiting for your beloved to propose and take the plunge into marriage?  Are you waiting for your house to sell or maybe a contract on a new home to come through?  Where ever you are in your waiting process, I hope this post has encouraged you. Trust in Him.  He is ever faithful -- more than we deserve!  If it is in His will, it will be your turn soon.  Your name will be called and when it is called, rest assured it will be in his perfect timing!  But of course, sometimes your name may not be called and that may mean that you are in the wrong waiting room.  Pray for his wisdom and guidance during those times to lead you to the right waiting room.